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Friday, October 18, 2013

Clueless Computer Operator

I needed to submit some documents by 6pm, so i quickly edited and proof read it. All this i had to do in a short time in order to meet the deadline because it was already 4pm. When all corrections were done and i was satisfied with my work,i copied it into a flash drive,checked what i had copied to be sure it was there,quickly scanned through the document one more time and dashed into the nearest business centre.
I met a guy(probably the owner of the business centre). The previous times i came,i met a young girl,this guy is much more older,he didn't look like who worked for somebody.
I exchanged pleasantries with him and told him i wanted to print out some documents from my flash drive, he said and i quote "Shebi you will buy time to do it"? I was like,what! I don't need time to print out documents from my flash drive.
This was a first sign that this guy had little or no knowledge about the business. Instead of me to leave and save myself all the trouble,i still stayed,showing him my flash,that what i wanted to print was in it. (by the way,the guy is ibo,so you can imagine how "shebi" sounded on his lips).
He started his Laptop,then collected the flash drive and inserted it slowly. It was as if he was on slow motion,that was the second sign,i still refused to give in to the voice of reasoning warning me that this guy would only waste my time.
Then he removed his MTN modem from another computer and inserted it in the same laptop,perhaps he thinks internet is needed to print documents,that was the third sign.
After opening the document,he sat admiring my document for almost fifteen minutes,while he caressed the mouse,or so i think it looked,i was wondering what he was doing.
I politely asked if he was having any trouble printing,as i had to meet a deadline and i have spent almost twenty minutes with no result.
He said he could not find "print",that usually when he puts on his laptop,it pops up and he can't find it now.
I patiently offered to assist,so that i would quickly leave. You won't believe it! All the while he was staring at my document,and my document stared back,he hadn't put on the printer not to talk of connecting the cable to the laptop. When he put it on and connected the cable,i saw him put paper,but couldn't tell what quantity it was.
In less than two minutes i sent the document to printer,only a page printed out and the laptop displayed this message "out of paper".
(trouble in Malaysia,i whispered). He was asking me what happened,can you imagine that? By now i was beginning to run out of patience,frustration was gradually sipping in.
I told him,you OBVIOUSLY inserted only a sheet of paper,that is what happened. You have a rim of paper here,why would you even insert only one?
Clueless in Abuja said he thought the document was one page,i said,but it shows 10pages? He said but he can only see one page,i said but ofcourse,you don't expect to see all the pages at once.
I also said he had succeeded in wasting 25minutes of my time that i can't get back,yet my documents aren't printed.
He bursted out angrily,genuinely upset,which by the way suprised me. He said and i quote." Why are you distracting me? Don't you know that printing any document from the computer is BRAIN WORK"? (see groove on top ocean oh).
Brain work? I echoed,printing does not take time if you know what you are doing.(my people,abi na true say to print require brain work)
Clueless in Abuja was no longer listening to me,he kept ranting and ranting,that instead of me to be patient so that he can concentrate i was complaining,that when i am in a business centre,i should allow them that are proffessionals do their job.(dis one na see finish oh).
I said, says a guy who has no idea on how to print.
So he was struggling to print,but printer won't respond,by this time i was pissed.
I told him i was no longer interested in wasting my time,so i want my flash drive back.
This pissed of Clueless (i guess because of the money he would lose).
He kept talking angrily,as far as i was concerned,he was speaking Latin,he didnt want to give my flash back to me,he was trying to bully me into printing.(see me see trouble wey no d ring bell oh,abi na by force)? I refused to be intimidated,and insisted on leaving.

I paid for the page that printed out and he grudgingly returned my flash drive,i literally snatched it from his hand and i left.